Everyone, today is my birthday- my 30th birthday. I had originally taken the day off to head to the mountains for some xc skiing or hiking but after spending two sick days at home and still feeling crappy, I opted to save my vacation day and come to work instead. Woop-dee-doo.
I’ve been working on this birthday post for weeks because I don’t know how to express how I’m feeling about turning 30. A co-worker of mine said it best “I think it doesn’t matter how old you are but how happy you are with life and what you’ve accomplished so far.” That would explain why I am so freaked out!
I am 30 and I have no idea what I’m doing with this life or what/who I want to be. Don’t you think by 30 you should have at least an inkling?
“We all know and accept that we are different humans, with different bodies, characteristics, features, and lives. Yet there is still such a general stereotype of what woman should look like, or be like at any given age. And every single aspect seems to be monitored: Hair, eyes, body, wardrobe, employment, family life, bank accounts, relationships, car, diet, hobbies… “ (Rebekah Steen, Goldfish Kiss)
When I tell people my age, no matter how old or young they are, they all tell me they thought I was in my early 20’s. When I ask “is it because I look so young?” the answer is always “No. You just act like a 22 year old.” I choose to take that as a compliment! Because acting like a adult is BORING!
Though I act like I’m in my early 20s, I spent my 20’s trying to act older. I tried to achieve success in the workplace by acting like I was 50 and I worked so hard to fit society’s definition of where I should be for a woman my age. I’m over that now. It took me until I was 30 to discover I’m doing life wrong. I’m trying to fit society’s standard of how I should act and what I should have and I’m done with it.
I want to spend my 30s breaking out of the mould and really figuring out who I am, what I’m passionate about, and appreciating each day for what it has to offer.
“I don’t want to feel like I need to escape my day to day life, or constantly be counting down the months or days until my next escape.” (Joanna, Living Mint Green)
When I read this on Jo’s blog it hit me like a ton of bricks. I have spent most of my life living for my next escape, my next weekend adventure or long vacation. But being married with a mortgage and two step kids means uprooting my life and heading to Hawaii or the mountains isn’t possible so I have to make the life I have one that I don’t want to escape from.
I intend to kick off my 30s doing two things- starting a family and creating a life that meets my needs- not one that fits some mould.
And falling under those two things include; turning my home into a sanctuary, starting a savings account, finding my signature style, learning to like cooking, finding a career I’m passionate about, making sure Ryan knows how much he is appreciated and loved.
Sorry for the rambling guys, I’ve been lying in bed sick for two days just reflecting on life.
Any tips for self discovery and creating a life you don’t need to escape from?